Her splendor and glory

This time I am covering a topic that is unusual because it doesn’t apply to my primary audience. I’m talking about it partly because it was requested, and partly because it is important to understand why it doesn’t apply to youth.

It is interesting that many of the women who object most to covering their hair are the most independent-minded feminists. They object that they shouldn’t have to cover up because of a man’s weakness. At the same time, I have heard adamant feminists defend their modesty because they shouldn’t have to show anything off for the benefit of men. In the end, I think they’re both correct. A woman should not choose her clothing at all based on what men think or how men will react. She should choose her clothing as a reflection of her personal connection to the Holy One, blessed be He.

That being said, Kisui HaRosh (covering the head) is a part of the commandments regarding modesty, but it doesn’t apply to most of my audience. Kisui HaRosh is a commandment that applies specifically to married women, and this goes back to Numbers 5:18. “And the priest will bring the woman up before HaShem and uncover the head of the woman…”

This statement is a part of the test of the adulterous wife, and so it is deduced that a married woman should cover her head. The instructions of covering the head for a woman are given in Shulchan Aruch, Orach Chayim 75, where it is stated that all of her hair should be covered. If she does so her children and grandchildren will be blessed (Babylonian Talmud, Yoma 47a), again implying that this only applies to married women. This is interesting because it points out that the central tenet of this commandment is not to prevent men from lusting. If it was, then the Torah would give us the same commandment that Islam and certain Christian rites have, that all women cover their heads, regardless of marital state. This is not the case. Note also that some authorities even prefer that women wear wigs, which may be more beautiful than their original hair! (Igros Kodesh, vol. XIX, p. 428)

So what is the purpose of this commandment? It is not to hide a woman’s beauty, but to accentuate a different kind of beauty. “Charm is deceitful, and beauty is transient, but a woman who fears HaShem, she is worthy of praise.” Proverbs 31:30. As with the Kippa, the primary goal of Kisui HaRosh is to promote the fear of Heaven. It emphasizes that a righteous woman is clothed in strength and dignity (Proverbs 31:25), not just what she is wearing on the outside. Why only married women? Headcoverings have been likened to a queen’s crown, a symbol of her status, a mark of her dignity. As much as a wedding ring, covering her head marks a change of status for a woman. Before her marriage a woman’s hair is not considered erotic, but once she is married it becomes a beautifully sexual thing which is not so much hidden, but saved. A married woman’s hair is not something to be embarrased of, it’s like the good china, which you keep in a top cupboard until you have extra special guests.